5.31.2011

Game Over

...It's been fun. Childish, yes...but so much fun.

It was a game to see if I could make you insane... I'm not sure that it was me, so much, or if you just are... either is a great possibility. It was funny because people "egged it on", and went along with it.  (You know how little kids are...when they are being mean to people...if they have other kids laughing and agreeing with them, they continue to do it... It's amazing how much stuff from childhood carries over throughout adulthood...)

I pretended to be your friend. I pretended to like you. I did it...partially out of respect for him (you know...my not being a bitch)...partially, because I knew you didn't like me...but somehow, you wouldn't be mean unless I was... I dunno. (All part of the fun & games.) Perhaps we are (scarily) more alike than it might first seem.

That was being two faced. Pretending.

Recently, I decided I wouldn't pretend anymore. I couldn't pretend anymore. So...I was real...-ish. However, the tension was so thick, you could have cut it with a knife. It made things difficult for everyone. So, I figured I could tone it down...just a little.

I don't like you. I never really have. I don't like what you are doing to my friend. He's not the same person...you know...when you're around and when you're not. I worry about him. That's my "mama cat syndrome".

However, it's not my place... if he says he's happy with things the way they are... then all that should matter is that he says he's happy. He's a good kid and I love him, so I suppose I have to respect that and all that it implies. I still don't like you.

Game over.

"Being nice to someone you
don't like is not being two-faced.
It's called being a grown up."

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